If you are carrying a mobile, you might have already experienced the annoying calls from the telemarketers. If you are a credit card user or if you have taken a loan, then the number of calls you receive will increase and sometimes you will become mad. Some of the telemarketers even don’t ask if it is the correct time to call and go on explaining about the product they are selling. If you say “not interested,” still they ask you to listen what they are telling, which is really annoying. Sometimes, we even get repeated calls though we asked them not to call again.
I have two friends who are really good at making fun out of these calls. They enjoy those calls with funny answers to their questions and at the end of the call, the telemarketer will feel that their sales pitching is a waste of time.
One of my colleagues, Billa Ashok, is one of those two guys. We cry out of laugh listening to the conversation he will have with these telemarketers. Recently, a guy called offering personal loan and Ashok put him into conversation for half an hour asking for 1 lakh loan. The guy explained everything without asking about the Ashok’s profession, salary, and savings. He explained all the document requirements, monthly EMI, etc. and at the end he asked how much salary Ashok is drawing. Ashok told him that he is drawing around Rs. 4000 after all cuttings (just to make himself not eligible to apply for the 1 lakh loan). The loan guy hanged up the phone and eventually disconnected listening to the salary figure. He occasionally records the conversation in his Nokia mobile, which has the call recording facility.
For your information, Ashok is a young guy who is just recently married and is a medical transcriptionist.
Recently, a lady called Ashok from Country Club pitching for membership sale, which is priced at Rs. 1.5 lac, which only high-income people can afford. I don’t know how these people gather the mobile numbers. They should get the phone number of high-income group and not every Tom, Dick, and Harry. Telemarketers should politely ask about the profession first to make sure that they are pitching the right person to whom they can sell the product. If they find that the customer is not worth of pitching, they should delete the number, so that another associate would not waste calling the same customer again. The same lady called him two times and the conversation was hilarious. Below are those two conversations. Listen and enjoy! (These are in Telugu language).
Call #1: Ashok tells the telemarketing lady that he owns a rice mill and has two grown children. He even tries to sell rice to the lady. At the end, he asks the lady to call when he is not busy in the shop and when the lady asks how she will know that he is not busy, Ashok tells her to call to know if he is busy or not. She says okay. Listen to the hilarious conversation.
Call #2: The same lady calls again. This times the lady offers a discount and asks in which profession Ashok is. He tells her that he runs cycle puncture shop. The lady asks whether he can afford to buy a membership at Rs. 36,000. He says that he is interested and he can sell the land he owns to buy the membership. At the end, he tell the lady that he will ask his wife and let her know because if he is not taking her permission, she will yell at him. Enjoy the funny definitions he has given to club, family entertainment, massage parlor, and restaurant & bar.
Call #3 & #4: This is a telemarketer call pitching for insurance product. He tells the lady that he is a roadside balloon vendor. As soon as he tells that he sells balloons, the lady says “Thank you…have a nice day” and tries to cut the phone. He tries to continue the call…but she tells that she will call again with full details. Her senior calls and carries on the conversation. Again, he tells that he sells balloons and asks about the benefits of taking an LIC policy. He tells her that he is investing the money in Chits and asks her to tell the benefits he gets if he invests in LIC. She thinks that he is really a balloon vendor, so tells him to invest in chits and cuts the phone deciding that she can’t sell the product to him at any cost. Enjoy the conversation in two clips.
I will write a follow-up post on how to stop getting these telemarketing calls. Until than, enjoy the funny audios.